The Guys

The guys are archetypes, and they usually come in very specific flavours. Some of the following are practically always included in the setup:

The Domineering Asshole is abrasive, rude, and infuriatingly condescending. He has issues with humans/women in general, and before even getting to know you, he’s decided that you’re a particularly stupid/tedious/naïve specimen. Of course, he usually has reasons for his behaviour, mostly abandonment issues stemming from a lonely childhood. He will call you literally anything but your actual name.

The Genuinely Nice Guy sounds like a walk in the park in comparison, but your issue there will be that he is so warm and friendly with everybody, that you cannot possibly assume that his interest in you is in any way special. Also, he might be too nice for his own good, giving you up to someone whose interest in you looks more beneficial for you in his eyes.

The Steadfast Presence has your back. He is reliable, solid, of even temperament. He will often be the leader of a group, and as such, he is fair and respected. He has everybody’s best interests at heart. He is often Lawful Good, but of course there’s no such thing as “Lawful Nice”.

The Incorrigible Tease likes to, uh, tease you endlessly. He likes to insinuate all kinds of things that will make you blush, stammer, trip, or otherwise embarass you, and then he never follows through. He will typically be the last to realise that, while he thought he was “just playing” you, he’s already fallen for you.

The Smooth Operator is a lot like the Tease, but with the full intention of winning your heart/getting in your pants. His own heart is, of course, completely off-limits, which is usually the result of a tragic love in his past.

Prince Charming should not be confused with the Tease or the SO, as his flirting comes from a genuine place of interest. He does, however, come across as trying too hard, or worse, as insincere, since his act is so smooth. You will often interpret his actions along the same line as the Genuinely Nice Guy’s: his shtick sounds so well-rehearsed, you must assume he’s like this with everyone.

The Trickster is the guy to whom everything is a joke. Needless to say, we know this defense mechanism from real life, so this is nothing new. A lot of them are in reality Sad Clowns, using humour in order to keep people at a distance.

The Puppet Master shows the same behaviour as Prince Charming, except all the bad things you assumed in the latter are actually true here. He has an ulterior motive and uses you as a tool, all the while displaying the façade of the GNG. He will probably describe you as his pet or toy, and give you a name accordingly.

He-Man Woman Hater – a description I’m blatantly stealing from TV Tropes – hates women. There are often reasons for this, but hardly ever any good ones.

The Puppy. So. This concept has me baffled. More than the GNG or the Comedian, the Puppy is just so… innocent. Except not. He will probably be a little pervert. He can display traits of the Puppet Master. Anyway, he will make big, sad puppy eyes at you, trying to get you to take responsibility for them.

The Dark Mysterious Type is not always dark, but always mysterious. He is the quiet one who speaks no more than strictly necessary. He will basically find you too loud and borderline annoying, even while you secretly grow on him. You will, of course, misunderstand everything about him all the time, and he won’t clarify his motives until backed into a corner.

There will usually be at least four suitable (or unsuitable, as it were) bachelors, while the most I’ve seen is a roster of twelve. Combinations of the above types are not just possible, but necessary; the characters may not be overly complex, but they are not one-dimensional, either.